God delivered the mail today.- My mom

Warning: This is going to be a long one.

Ok, so I know in my last post, I talked about how there's been a lot of issues and I just haven't been able to deal with them. Well the main one has been money. I know that there are a ton of people going through the same thing right now, but I was in pretty deep.

As I've said before, I'm student teaching right now so I had to quit my full time para (student aid) job last December because obviously I can't be working while I'm teaching at a different school. I've been seriously looking for a night/weekend job since November but haven't been able to find one. And trust me, I've been EVERYWHERE. No one is hiring and if they are, my hours don't work.

So, I haven't worked since December except for a few little jobs like at the church or babysitting or something. Well, those have helped keep my head above water for awhile, but now I'm starting to sink.

My phone was shut off a week ago because I'm two payments behind. The car loan people are calling because I'm one payment behind and if the March and April payments aren't made soon, it will be repossessed. If I don't pay my college the last $2000 I owe them by April 17, I will not graduate in May. I have to pay $100 to test out of a class so that I can graduate and then pay the credit hours for that class on top of that, roughly another $1000. Graduation fee is $100 separately, plus announcements (which I know aren't a necessity, but I'd really like to have them). These bills on top of credit cards (which I literally haven't paid in 6 months) and car insurance. Oh, and gas, and you know, FOOD.

So, I've been totally freaking out, stressed about all of this. Seriously not knowing what I'm going to do. And it's not like I don't want to pay these things, because I really do. I feel like such a worthless loser, but I really don't have the money. If I did, I wouldn't be behind on anything.

So, my mom's husband is retired from GM. And when I started college, there was talk of GM paying for part of it, but then since he was retired, everyone said that I didn't qualify. Well, in January my mom called and talked to someone who said I just might but everything had to be filled out and turned in quickly because they were stopping the program March 31. So I immediately got to work. Calling both of the colleges that I've been a regular student at and filling out these really intense applications. Which there were 5 of, because I've been in school for 5 years. Well, by the time I got everything from the colleges and got it all in order and filled out, it was the beginning of March already. So, I mailed it off and waited. And waited and waited. My mom called to talk to someone to see if it was in fact received, but apparently, that's privileged information. Which is weird because the other lady she talked to could tell her everything, but all of a sudden it was top secret. So, I've really been praying hard about it, knowing that there was a reason I was told I didn't qualify for the last 4 years, because I really need all of the money now. I've been having a panic attack for the last week, just wondering if anything was going to happen.

Then, today I had to stay late at school because there were conferences. Well, we had gone to get something to eat (and trust me, I paid in change). I'm very embarrassed about this fact and have told very little people, so I couldn't exactly tell the teachers I work with that "No, I don't have money for food." Luckily, they were easily talked into Taco Bell. Thank goodness for the 69 cent menu! So, anyway, we pull back up and I see my mom's car in the parking lot. In my head, I'm wondering why she's up here, but my 5th grade brother goes to the school, so maybe she has a conference about him even though she just had a meeting about him yesterday or maybe he forgot something, I don't know. So I walk in and she's waiting for me in the lobby with a family friend of ours who had just finished her conference. So we start talking and my mom goes "Well, actually I came up here to tell you that God delivered our mail today." and hands me the check from GM. I got all that I was eligible for and tears came to my eyes immediately. I will be able to relieve a lot of that stress and pay off some things. Obviously, I'll be saving most of it and paying things as they come, but I'll be comfortable now. I just finally feel like in about a year, I can relax for a second, at least about the money situation.

Man, and if you read all of this, you're amazing!

So, thank you for all of your good wishes and thoughts because He was definitely listening.